Happy Wednesday beauty!
I was asked to share a message that I hope brings you peace, as far too many of us have been brought up in ‘toxic shame’ environments. When we know better…we do better. The reality is that the majority of us were raised by (hopefully) well meaning parents/caregivers, yet probably unconscious ones, repeating the patterns of their own familial upbringing. They did not always serve us well. Toxic shame can build and cause all sorts of personality issues. Check out the work of John Bradshaw, a world expert, to learn more on this topic. But here’s what was true for me…and my sense is I’m not all that different than many people…possibly you too?
I was raised by parents who were actually children working out their own psychodramas within their marriage and how they showed up affected me in some interesting ways. For example, I wanted a warm and cozy mommy to just hold and BE with me… especially when I was at times a scared and confused teenager. She could not do this. It was not in her. She did however show me her love by ‘doing’ for me. She did make me beautiful handmade clothes. That was her major love language: ‘Acts of Service’.
I know now that her history includes a cold and distant mother who was forced to become the little woman of the family when she lost her own mother at a very young age. If you can somehow make peace and forgive those who by not giving you what you wanted growing up (through no fault of their own), may have actually given you what you needed… to become your fierce and resilient self…and hopefully a wiser and more compassionate human…life gets a lot easier from this perspective ♡ Is it possible that you can give hope to others because of the Story you were meant to survive?
In the end…I do believe that connecting to your authentic heart and soul and learning to love yourself deeply, flaws and all, is a wonderful antidote to the inevitable shame that too many of us have been raised with. Consider that your mission is to continuously live in your high vibration zone (Love Your Vibe) where you get to create the life of YOUR dreams…miracles consistently find you…just by choosing self love over the shame that binds you.
At Your Service, E